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Jimmy

-ick!

I watched the movie Juno yesterday. I liked it but felt pretty strongly that it shouldn't win best film or anything (it didn't). Anyway, there is a scene where Jason Bateman's character is showing Juno his music collection and music equipment. He drops the bomb that he opened for the Melvins back in 1993 and that this was pretty much the high point of music. Later you see him play "Doll Parts" on guitar with her. Schwoo, I really hate moments like this in movies even when they are something I can so closely relate to. Yeah, I used to listen to The Melvins and Nirvana and even Hole but I get this sinking awkward feeling seeing it on screen, like I'm embarassed for that person or there is just something blatantly wrong with it as though it lacks conviction or something. Maybe I just didn't really believe Jason Bateman as this guy or maybe it's because I just think I know better. I get the feeling that this guy is me, or at least what Hollywood is trying to relate me to. Then the scene came on where he pops in The Carpenter's soundtrack with Sonic Youth's cover of "Superstar" and he relays to Juno that this is quite possibly one of the best covers ever done... and this most certainly was ME. I've specifically had this exact conversation on multiple occasions before. And now I figure out what is wrong... it's not the acting necessarily or bad writing even, it's that it gets so bad when a movie has to dumb down music knowledge to reach the average joe. This film might have been better off just leaving out all the music explanations (even though I did appreciate the "Superstar" reference). The book High Fidelity seemed to do a pretty good job of this, sometimes it just takes being elitist and poking fun at yourself for being the way that you are. BTW- whoever was in charge of putting all the Kimya Dawson and Moldy Peaches as the soundtrack for Juno, kudos to you, you could not have been more right on.

Does anybody remember the early 90s show Video Power? I was at work today and was talking about video game theme music with a co-worker and suddenly remembered this gem of a show that I watched religiously as an 11-year old. The premise was pretty simple, make a game show with kids playing video games, we'll throw in a crazy host named Johnny Arcade, and at the and at the end we'll have the winner run through a maze of video games. This labyrinth was what kept me watching. The winning kid got a chance to run through walls and walls of all the hottest video games attaching them to velcro pads on their special suit and helmet. At the end, they'd slide through a tunnel and if they happened to uncover a special prize (I think it was a game that had a gold star under it or something), they would win a big grand prize like a Neo Geo or some other (at the time) elite gaming system. At left, is a picture of the slide.

I wonder if wikihow knew about my Zombie Houseswarming party last year because today's How to of the Day is "How to Look Like a Zombie".

-ick!

There once was a girl from Nairobi
Who lived inside an adobe
She spent half the day
Basking away
And listening to mix tapes of Moby

Alright, now what do you have?

-ick!

You know what you can't buy in China? Index cards. Seriously, I've looked.

But you can get notepads, and they always have special messages in English for you:

The best quality and design is just for you.
You will feel like writing with it all the time.

This is the most comfortable pad you have ever run in to.

Accompany with your growing
Assistant for your success

Thank you, notebook. I feel more successful already.

Seriously, this is the best idea ever:

Basically, you're a razor, and you have to run through a number of increasingly weird 3D levels, chasing cats, and shaving their balls. The cats get increasingly hard to find, and there are an amazing number of them. There are tabbies, tortoise-shells, Siamese, and cougars. As you complete levels the razor gets more powerful and you have to be careful not to hurt the cats or neuter them. When you succeed in shaving a cat's balls, it spits up a diamond that you can collect.

As seen at Crooked Timber.